Getting my head around things... Home for a rest...

Well- here I am. Home alas & yet I cannot wait to be " on the road again." It`s ironic because as much as I enjoy traveling & exploring the unknown- there always seems to be a countdown going on in the back of my head until I`m back in my own bed- surrounded by everything that it familiar... and yet a few days surrounded by the familiar & my feet are already beginning to itch! I don`t know if other travelers experience this and perhaps it might even be different my second year in Australia- but the grass really always does appear to be greener on the other side. How bizarre...

Anyways, I`ve been home for three weeks now- ample time to relax, study for my remaining psych exam, catch up on all of the shows I`ve missed, and stuff my face with all kinds of Christmas goodies (when really I had intended to spend this time at home undoing the damage of Neta`s cooking in Quindanning--- the pub where I stayed for 16 weeks to get my second year visa). I`m just going to enjoy it while it lasts & take each day one at a time. In about five weeks or so- I`ll be stuffing my clothing back into my backpack (which I might actually trade in for a suitcase) & will be boarding a plane back to Australia. And this time I`m going to try my best to live in the moment & not have this constant forecast of the future... I`m going to lie back & enjoy the uncertainty of tomorrow. Not everything needs to be perfect. Not everything needs to be planned. These are some important things I`ve learned about myself this year. I try too hard to control everything around me. Not everything needs to be written in an agenda. Things change. It`s ok.

While home, I am going to be applying for two schools for admission into the Bachelor of Social work program for this upcoming September. It will be interesting to see if I get in--- and probably a whole lot more interesting to see if I actually end up going if I do. The thing is- this is hands down my absolute last shot in Australia- my final 12 months! And I love Australia. I really REALLY do. I love the weather, the lifestyle, the high standard of living, its diversity, its people... And if I leave it behind to go back to school in September- I`ll be throwing away 5 good months in Australia. I love how uncertain my future in Australia is when I`m there... It`s like a rollercoaster ride! Yet, back in school in Canada- It`ll be back to that boring & predictable (no social life) life I was so desperate to escape 2 years ago when I finally left behind Halifax & my student status... Hmmmm... All I know is that I`m not going to make any decisions now. I will wait and see what happens in a few months time when I receive word from the universities whether or not my application for admittance has been approved. Time will tell...

Just a few words on my past year abroad---

Getting on that plane & sending myself as far away from home as I possibly could (all by myself) was the best thing I could have done for myself. I learned more about the world around me & about myself than I have learned in the past 24 years of my life here on earth. I had a blast & never imagined that it would be half as great an experience as it was. If someone were to ask me what my favorite part of the trip was, what my favorite country was, or where I enjoyed myself the most--- I wouldn`t even be able to answer them. All of my experiences were unique & great in different ways and it would be therefore impossible to compare them. Of course each place I was had its fair share of times in which I thought I couldn`t bare another minute & also of times in which I couldn`t imagine ever having to leave... everything had its good & bad points, but overall--- all of the experiences were worthwhile! As I`m about to go back into the world a third time--- there are quite a few things that I`ve learned that I want to do differently & I will. I want to go out there with an even MORE open mind & I want things to just happen... one day at a time...

Here are some pics taken while home (this time around...):

Aloha from Hawaii!

Overall, my year in the world has been the greatest learning experience of my life and I can only hope that my next adventure overseas into the unknown will prove to be just as enlightening. Among the many things that I came to learn in this past year- is that you have to take things one day at a time or you`ll wind up going crazy. I`ve learned that the flights we want aren`t always the ones we get, that hindrances like expired passports and required country visas sometimes stand in our way, and that as much as you research and think that your trip plans may be finalized- there`s always the chance that you`ll come across something that makes all the more sense- and you grab it! Just like that- any number of a million different factors can drastically alter your adventure`s course... and so they have!
While I should be writing this entry from Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam- I write it from the island of Oahu in Hawaii. For months I had researched and planned a November stint in an orphanage in Vietnam, but in the end it did not work out the way that I wanted it to. The position I was offered dealt with children suffering from abnormalities, & physical and mental disabilities, and though it seemed like a good opportunity to lend a helping hand- I knew it wasn`t "my thing." Someday I hope to work along the lines of international adoptions, and so I would like to work in your typical developing country orphanage. In addition to the initial blow that the assignment wasn`t what I had in mind, I was living in Quindanning (45 minutes away from internet access) and I couldn`t get the necessary paperwork (visa for Vietnam entrance & passport renewed) in time for my trip`s start date.
I was starting to stress abit at the time about what I was going to do and where I would go for the month of November with Vietnam no longer a feasible option. I wouldn`t have been stressing if not for the simple fact that I just didn`t have the access to internet needed to fully research other possible routes. In the end, I trekked into the nearest down with Hayden, one of the Quinny locals who works in town, and spent a full day on the internet looking up flights, etc. In the end, I decided to extend my work at the pub by an extra 2 weeks & booked a flight for home with a stopover in Hawaii (Why not?). Stopping in Hawaii was my cheapest option and I decided that I would make it a 6-day beach holiday before heading home. I decided I may as well just head home as opposed to traveling anywhere else until December because I knew I just didn`t have the time to do the research I would need to do, anyways.
Probably the dumbest idea of my entire trip was that of spending three nights alone in a hotel in Perth before flying out to Honolulu on the Tuesday. I spent 16 weeks literally surrounded 24/7 by people. We lived three girls practically on top of one another, when we weren`t chatting it up with hundreds of different people from behind the bar, we were doing so from the other side of the bar, or we were hanging out in groups around the fire outside, or talking with the women in the kitchen. There was always someone banging some kind of a tool or shouting outside my bedroom window, always someone to talk to, and always someone to hang around with. And all of a sudden my world had turned upside down and I was standing on a busy city street all by myself or sitting in my hotel room - all by myself. It probably wasn`t as depressing as I make it out to be, but it was just a little bit too much time to think things over. I may have only been in Quindanning for 16 weeks, but because I spent every waking hour surrounded by the same people- it felt as if I had known them my entire life. Without a doubt- of all the places I`ve had to leave- I would say that Quindanning was the hardest to say good-bye to. It`s always hard to look people in the eye and know that you are more or less saying good- bye forever. I know that with the passing of time I`ll often find myself wondering what all of the locals are up to & how the pub has changed (or whether it has at all). I used to joke to the others that I felt as though Red was my cranky uncle from down the street & as I say this- I wonder what he is doing right now... haha.
Anyways, after a 9 hr flight to Honolulu, I took a shuttle to the "Waikiki Gateway Hotel" about a 5 minute walk to the world famous beach. Of course my room wasn`t yet ready because it was still before 8am, so I went and grabbed some breakfast at the restaurant across the street (a veggie omelette...mmmm!) At noon, my room was still not ready and I was honestly too jetlagged to wander the streets any longer, so I quickly accepted a $5 upgrade to a room with a kitchenette and a balcony- and was on my way. I was tired to the point where I was near tears that my room was still not ready! haha. And so the next 6 days were spent lounging by the pool trying desperately to add some color to my now white skin (after an Aussie winter in Quindanning), exploring the shops (where I spent the majority of my time), walking around the streets, and shopping at the nearby Ala Moana outdoor shopping centre. I really didn`t do anything very touristy and didn`t take in any of the culture, but sometimes we just need a bit of space and time to unwind. Afterall, I had been gone a year and was on the last leg of my adventure- I didn`t want to have to do the hostel thing--- I wanted to be alone with ample of time to reflect on my year abroad... and that`s exactly what I did... and still am doing! (haha)

My thoughts on Hawaii: I can`t say that I would ever necessarily want to go there again. After being on some of the beaches I was on in Southeast Asia, I didn`t find Waikiki beach to be anything very special at all. I found the shops to be full of REALLY tacky souvenirs (aka. junk). The feel of the city was that of being caught between an American influence & a Japanese one. The beach boasted brown sand. The shops that weren`t tacky were too high end to even consider walking into. Then again- I didn`t go to any of the shows or a Lu`au- so maybe had I taken in some of the culture my thoughts on Hawaii may have been a little bit more positive. Overall, I enjoyed my time in Hawaii, but I won`t be going out of my way to plan another stopover there in the near future. There are just too many other places to discover and explore.

"Utes", Johnie Cash, Cowboy hats, & Sheep pastures= Feeling as though I`ve gone back in time 50 years...

16 weeks spent living virtually in the middle of nowhere 2 hours southeast of Perth. The nearest gas station/ grocery store/ internet facilities were 45 minutes away. At times I literally felt as though I had gone back 50 years in time--- seeing the farmers pull up at the pub with their old style "utes" with their sheep dogs on the back while the farmers sipped an afternoon beer to Johny Cash in the background.... hehe

At times I felt so absolutely lonely & isolated- frustrated at being so cut off from the rest of the world, but I lived there with two other girls and we got each other through it with our "shenanigans." The locals were really friendly & such characters! The pub/restaurant was really busy for the most part (which kept us on our toes)--- and the scenery & surroundings were beautiful. I was so sure that I couldn`t wait to leave and yet at the end of 16 weeks I was absolutely devastated when it began to register that the ending was near... Even now- 4 weeks later- I still think about good `ol Quinny all of the time. I wonder whose at the pub, what the locals are talking about, what band is playing this Thursday...etc etc. It`s funny how we see things differently once we remove ourselves from the situation. The hardest part to adapt to was going from always being surrounded by someone (we`d always be sitting in the pub when we weren`t working surrounded by people or us girls would be at home in the crash palace with each other)--- to being completely alone all of a sudden with no one to talk to. I decided to check into a motel in Perth for three nights to relax and have my own space. At the time it seemed like a smart idea- but once I was dropped off I found myself not knowing what to do with myself or with all of the space at my finger tips all of a sudden...

Quinny will always be a fond memory. I think perhaps my constant thoughts of it to this day are the result of feeling as though there was no closure in respect to certain aspects of the experience. One minute things were just like they had been for the past three months- and the next I`m saying good-bye as though I`m just going for a short ride when really my bags are packed at the door--- and this is good- bye forever...

Pimps, Prostitutes & Laws against chewing gum!

Though I wasn`t REALLY scared--- my experience in Singapore was probably the closet I came along my travels to feeling "uneasy" in my environment. When I arrived at the airport in the evening, I was sold on "the best value hotel" in the red light district. I admit that I must have been a little bit naive. I really just expected the red light district to mean I`d be in a high traffic area with lots of bars, restaurants & hotels.... haha!

Firstly- I was asked upon check in whether I`d like to rent my room by the hour or on a nightly basis. I was confused as to why they would offer such a thing... hehe (boy- I really am naive). Also, as a woman alone- I felt as though the hotel staff treated me as though I was dirt beneath their feet (now I realize that it was because they thought I was a prostitute in their hotel... fair enough). Anyways, it really wasn`t until morning that I realized just where I was when I went to cross the street to go to the drugstore and an Indian male approached me asking me how much I would charge him (at this point- I was still confused- thinking what a jerk he was for being so direct! hehe.. when really such a question would be perfectly normal there). To make matters even worse- the tattoo I got in the Philippines was badly infected and I could barely get around!

The strangest experience occurred even later that afternoon when I was walking down the main strip & was called over to one of the tables by an older Indian man wearing all kinds of jewelery. He was sitting at an outside table at one of the restaurants with several white men. I figured I had to at least say hello back, as it was the middle of the day. I couldn`t just run away! He fell in love with my blonde hair and refused to believe that I wasn`t a prostitute. He was sure I must be a Russian prostitute to be all alone in this area. He was determined to make me one of his girls & kept trying to make me offers. He kept telling me how much money I could make and was determined to get a yes out of me. I just kept laughing at his suggestions. He was quite the character! I doubt I`ll ever again meet anyone like him! Imagine- sitting in the red light district of Singapore with one of the main pimps! Next thing I knew- two older German men came to sit at the table and the pimp called over two Thai women who obviously worked for him. He starts asking the men if they`d like these girls and the men comment on how ugly & fat they are (to their face while we all sat there). I couldn`t help but laugh, thinking to myself "this really cannot be happening- this is all just a dream." A group of men come running across the street from the back alleys where they`ve obviously been doing some illegal gambling or drugs (or both). It`s 10am and yet there is a young Asian women wearing a mini skirt, high heels, and fixing her make-up on every inch of the main streets--- hoping for some business... Honest to god- I had to keep pinching myself to make sure I really was witnessing all of this. You see movies with this stuff & you read about this stuff- and yet you don`t believe it`s reality until it`s there very real before you! Later on, I went into the downtown bit of Singapore where it`s all very posh boutiques and the contrast was so shocking! It was literally like stepping out of one world and into a very different one...

Two nights later, after being told by a taxi driver to change hotels because I was crazy to be staying where I was as a white woman all alone & getting sick of all the attention I was getting from the men- I checked into a hotel closer to downtown Singapore for some peace of mind. I walked around Little India, checked out the markets, and watched some television in the evenings. I was glad to be away from the craziness of the red light district & to escape my new "friend".... but I was also happy to have seen that side of things. It truly was an "experience."

Saying Good-bye to the Philippines...